The old adage is honesty is the best policy. When stated the words are usually descriptive of one’s behavior in relationship with others. However, the quality of the interaction with another is determined by our personal ability to effortlessly be honest with ourselves. Addictions, unproductive habits, and undesirable behaviors are often the result of lies that we tell ourselves in areas of weakness because we have not yet known the truth or are denying the truth. This delusion fosters self-defeating behavior and the denial wraps us in chains of bondage so that we cannot become our best selves.
It seems that the only people who get a pass for being honest these days are elderly people and children. The elderly don’t care and the young have not yet become conditioned to know they should care. Both have no problem expressing what’s really on their minds. Everyone else is expected to somehow be politically correct, tell white lies, partial truths, remain silent or conform to the status quo. Well, I’m well past childhood but I decided a while ago that I was not going to wait until I am old to honestly express myself. I am worthy of self-respect and cannot expect from others what I am not willing to give to myself first. Being authentic means being genuine and real. I like to say it means acting like a grown ass woman.
Too often we assume responsibility for how other people feel about what we say or do. We cannot control how people feel. We are responsible for our own feelings and so are others responsible for theirs . Additionally, we choose whether or not to be offended. Being authentically you, doesn’t grant you a license to be rude or inconsiderate to others. Nonetheless, we cannot allow how others feel to cause us to be disingenuous to ourselves. Wisdom guides the way and practice builds the courage we need to stand truly to oursselves. One of the most daring things we will do in this life is to learn to live authentically. Courage is absolutely necessary in doing so. If we are not determined to hold on to our identity and define ourselves the world will define us. Anyone who attempts to live up to the opinions of others is a very unhappy person. You are the only person who can excel best at being you! You are an original! Why not be the best version of yourself? Becoming a copy of some else is a waste of time. The world needs the gift of you! No else is equipped to be you but you.
Hotep (peace to you),