Self-love: A Choice for Authenticity

“Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real.  The choice to be honest. The choice to let ourselves be seen.” Brene’ Brown

black and red floral happy birthday card
Photo by Annie Spratt

It is true, our lives are the sum total of every choice that we have ever made. Every choice we make creates the shape of our lives. Choices should be handled with care. No one should be allowed to take away our power to choose and neither should we flippantly throw it away.

Our choices display a visible reality of our own thoughts in action, reveal our heart’s desire, and expose our deepest secrets. Authentic choices allow us to truly be seen. As we are seen we are liberated from the shadows and we become a star in our own life. With that in mind we should choose wisely.

I’ve learned along my journey that my choices determine the quality of the life that I experience. If I choose beneath my abundant privilege and birth right my life will reflect those choices. Likewise, whenever I make choices in line with my divinity and authenticity, I enjoy living a fulfilling life with desirable  magnetic encounters and delightful synchronicities of affirmation.   

Further, I have discovered that we can learn about others not only by listening to what they say to us but by paying close attention to the choices that they make. The choices that we make speak volumes more comparatively than considering the individual abilities we demonstrate.. Our choices are a vibrant proclamation to the world about who we are. I have learned along my journey that when people show me who they are, I should believe them.

Our choices fall in one of two categories. When we choose it is either an expression of our authenticity or inauthenticity. There is no in between. In other words, when we make life decisions, we do so remaining true to our heart’s desire or in denial of what we really want and who we truly know ourselves to be at that time. Even still, when we do not make a choice, one has already been made. Every choice we make has the potential to uncover our unique greatness or conceal it more deeply. 

Self-Love has an extremely significant role in fashioning an authentic lifestyle.  Therefore, self-love and personal choice should go hand in hand in our daily lives. Self-love keeps our choices in line with our personal truths which is a strong characteristic of authentic living.  Without self-love we can deceive ourselves and be led astray from goals and desires that are dear to us and our divine purpose. To that point, we betray ourselves when we make or keep commitments to others that bring unfulfillment, discontentment, and discord to our lives. This results when we value the importance of showing love to others more than we value showing love to ourselves.

Our lives should flourish with continual acts of self-love. In other words, choosing ourselves first must be a priority in our lives. Love for others comes out of self-love, not vice-versa. For example, in case of an emergency on an airplane, the flight attendant always instructs each passenger to cover their own mouths with oxygen first before assisting other passengers. Giving to others is much easier when we have lovingly addressed our own personal needs first.

To some this may be a hard truth but even when we have children or significant others in our lives, we should never love them more than we love ourselves. When this happens, we are more likely to make decisions that bring about feelings of envy, resentment, emptiness, and regret. Self-love is not about neglecting our responsibilities, but it is about setting firm personal priorities that rank your own worthy well-being at the top of the list.

Authenticity is most apparent when love leads the way. When self -love is the priority of every day we transform our presence to one of abundance rather than scarcity. Then, love toward others does not have to be rationed from our being but can flow freely. Our presence then becomes a full flowing fountain and sacred opening that effortlessly and positively impacts others.

Copyright by Deana Gordon

“But until a person can say deeply and honestly,” I am  what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday,” that person cannot say, “ I choose otherwise.” Stephen R. Covey .

Thank you for reading! Post a comment! Authentic thoughts are thoughts that are genuine and sincerely expressed. Authentic thoughts reverberate with other authentic individuals so they have an irresistible urge to ponder and respectfully respond from their own unique perspective.

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Published by Dr. Deana Gordon

Dr. Deana Gordon: Authenticity. She presents herself via blog posts, presentations, or in consultations in a way that encourages others to be the best version of themselves. She finds it both a privilege and pleasure to coach others through this life process.

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